Is It Well With My Soul?

Hello Everyone it's a beautiful day here where I live. Lovely day for a walk with my dog. Gone hopefully are the days of unending clouds. Onto beautiful spring and sunshine. 

As I was walking my dog today again listening to music as I go. I use to not do that. It's just been the last couple of months that I started listening to music. But so good. Today listening to Mercy Me Lifer album. Like I said last post it's on repeat. Today as I'm going along feeling good then this song comes on. 

 

I'm still praising the Lord but tears are welling up a little. It reminds me of when my dad is dying of cancer at 64. We had just started a new church in the fall. My dad was diagnosed July 1 2004 with pancreatic cancer and was not given long to live. This church was singing a new song to us blessed be the name of the Lord. Some of the lyrics were:

 

“Blessed be your name

When I'm found in the desert place

Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out I'll

Turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name

On the road marked with suffering

Though there's pain in the offering

Blessed be your name”

I would sit there in church not able to sing. I would cry out to God please don't take my dad's life. Please Lord heal him. I would sometimes try and sing but it would often lead to tears and pleading prayers. It was a hard time. My dad had told me in the summer that if it was his time to die he was ready to go home. I was not ready for him to go. I hate cancer.

At this woman's conference I went to, one of the speakers had cancer. She called it a gift. She said that it drew her closer to Christ. I don't know if I could ever call cancer a gift. But one thing I think about is my daughter and her friends. See the day we left the ear nose and throat specialist's office and were driving home. I told my daughter how important it is for her to gather a support group around her. To tell some close friends so that they can pray for you. Would be very good that you tell your small group leader too. Madeline doesn't know who I have all told. I need the love and support of others at this time. The amazing prayers being lifted up. Hugely important. What I hope and pray for is that through this journey Madeline and her friends faith will be strengthened. That they will see miracles. That God will reveal Himself to them. Do I want my daughter to go through this to strengthen her faith? No not at all but as she is going through this then yes God do a mighty work. Reveal yourself to her time and time again.

I love the Lord and am close with him. Right now I can sing Even If but the one line “but what will I say when I'm held to the flame like I am right now.” When rubber hits the road and I am more closer to the flame then I am right now then what? Will I still be able to say “It is well with my soul'? 

Deborah 

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